Quoting George Carlin

"people are f**king stupid!"

My wife and I decided to sell an oriental rug a few weeks ago. We put an ad out on the internet in a local "for sale" portal, and received a response from someone within a couple of days. The buyer was very interested, and even offered me an extra $50 to hold the carpet for him.

But of course! I responded with my address information, so he could send the cashier's check, and kept in contact with the buyer. Well, there were some personal issues he ran into and such, and so it actually took 2 weeks for the cashier's check to arrive at my house. However, prior to this receipt, the buyer apologized profusely, but due to his personal problems, he made a mistake and sent me a check for 3 times the amount of the sale. After apologizing, he requested that I wire the difference back to him via Western Union and keep the difference for my carpet.

WHOA! Started smelling like a bit of shit here. Mrs Thew and I went on high alert at this point, it just seemed fishy. But, trying to still make things ok, we took the check (drawn on FNB) to our bank and deposited it after having the staff there check it out to see if it was legitimate (it looked "good enough" to use, but my old bank teller in me wasn't convinced). Well, my bank said it looked good and deposited it, and the money went into our account.

Somewhat satisfied after my bank said the check was good, and with the money in my account, I was prepared to give it a few days to clear via inter-bank transfer (even cashier's checks have to clear), but Mrs Thew, as stubborn as she is, took it a little further and checked into a couple of extra things:

a) the phone number on the Fedex envelope was a number in Ohio and was not in service (the buyer was in Florida)
b) the person to whom I was to wire the money lived in New York, and after digging, Mrs Thew found out that HE WAS DEAD (died in July 2007) - what the FRIKK?!
c) she went to the bank's website, and the front page of the bank's website said "BEWARE OF CHECK SCAMS!"

Armed with THIS information, I contacted FNB and spoke to a manager. Turns out that
1) the cashier's check number is not a sequence number that they currently use
2) the ABA number was NOT their bank ID number
3) the account on which this check was to be drawn was not one of theirs.

BAM! Gotcha! I wrote back to the buyer and said "you're out of luck asshole, we found you out!". Haven't heard from him since. Oddly enough, the money is still in our account earning interest - I am waiting for it to come back unpaid. Nothing yet tho.

Why do I think people are f**king stupid? BECAUSE STUPID PEOPLE FALL FOR THESE SCAMS!

"Hello, Thew, congratulations, you have won the Canadian Lottery. You have won $100,000! All we need to get the money from Canada to the US where you live is a $1000 processing fee. Please send and we'll cut you a check for your winnings." WOW, I didn't even play the Canadian Lottery, COOL!
"Mr Thew, I am Robert Zongo, I live in Nigeria, and I want to transfer money to my family in the US, and I need your help. I need to move $1,000,000 to a bank account, and will pay you $10,000 if you'll help me - to get the money there, I'll need $2,000 for fees and such to get the money there, can you send it to me, and I'll pay you your cut once the money has moved to my US accounts."
"Dear Thew, I would be happy to purchase your chair for $1,000, but I mistakenly sent $4,000 - can you please send me back the difference, and I'll arrange for a company to pick it up."

The manager at FNB told me a story about a man who deposited a check, then got upset when it came back as invalid. When questioned about the origin of the check, he said "well, it came in the mail and I just thought I got lucky". OH MY GOSH! You are f**king stupid!

These types of scams are perpetrated hundreds of times each money, targeting all types of individuals. But they are attempted constantly like that BECAUSE THEY WORK enough times to warrant continuation. DON'T BE F**KING STUPID. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. You never get something for nothing. Remember that! Stupid lazy americans...

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Vick got 23 months, close to the max sentence. A little credit for time already served, but still...good luck keeping up your "NFL calibre" skills in the slammer. You're entering prison as a tight end, I hope you don't exit prison as a wide receiver...

Mitchell's report is a severe blow to MLB. There are some significant names on that list, and even others not named have admitted using HGH to get better (ESPN analyst Fernando Vina as one), mostly because HGH is undetectable. Clemens? WOW. But frankly, Mitchell's report is a lotta hot air and powerless, since he says "these people shouldn't be punished, I'm just naming these people to illustrate the fact that we NEED testing and monitoring. Ho Hum... It'll be interested to see if Bud Selig actually grows some actually balls to deal with this, but frankly, I'm not sure. However, I will leave this discussion to a more than informational Buster Olney, who's blog nearly hits the nail on the head!

NHL Thuggery - Chris Simon (again), Ohlund, the entire Flyers team - more attempt to injure opponents, more "I'm sorry I lost control of myself and reacted in a dangerous manner" incidents and apologies - Colin Campbell needs to REALLY punish people with games and salary, not just continuing to slap people on the wrist. Yes, it's only a few bad apples, but being a fringe sport as hockey is, the less bad press they have, the better. Oh, yeah, get rid of the instigator rule and let the players police themselves - nothing will stop some cheap ass stick swinging Euro player from whacking someone like a facial beatdown from, say, Georges Laraque. You swing your stick, I'll majorly kick your ass.

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Update on Mrs Thew. Big. Getting bigger. Phat and happy. Little Thew better be a soccer player cuz of all the kicking - I certainly hope he's not a dancer - unless it's Thewlette, and they SHE will be a wonderful prima ballerina. :) Due date still in early March, things are goign along wonderfully.

Little Thew

Would that be a Thewlet?

Thanks for the mammaries...

I am completely unable to put out a better list than TILAM about "things to be thankful for", I will instead add my 2 cents:

My Health: I'm lucky. I'm able to work out 5 or 6 days a week, keeping in shape and good condition despite being on the nother end of 40. Put it this way, 3 years ago when my team won the Alpharetta GA softball championship, I led the team in home runs with 11 in 9 games - and I only hit ONE ball over the fence. I feel almost bad when I see disabled people, as there but for the grace of God go I. That is why I do my best to treat them normally - it's what they want.

My Family: I have wonderful parents who are still alive, vibrant, and healthy. I have a great brother who has been my best friend all my adult life. I have a fantastic wife, lunatic teenage children to make any parent proud, and a great floppy eared great dane pooch. And another little Thew on the way (although we don't know if it's a mr or miss Thew yet).

My Friends: Tilam has been my closest friend for wow, over 20 years. T-Dub has been my best female friend for way less time, but we share a bond of maturity, intelligence (umm, sort of), a love for gaming, sci-fi and fantasy, and the fact that we'd like to WHACK so many people with the CLUE hammer (otherwise known as "common sense"). Gus, not in this blog, has been my best golfing buddy for more years than he'd care to admit. If you can go through life with MAYBE 3 true friends that you can count on, you're ahead of the game. I have that, and I'm a better man for it.

My Work: I work for a great company (I've worked for some real clusterf**ks in the past) whose focus is on SUCCESS. Period. Let's do what need to do to be successful, both with our customers and ourselves. No politics, No infighting, just a great work environment.

Activies: not boredom. But, as Thew likes to say, "sometimes doing nothing is doing something". I have plenty of things to keep my mind occupied as well as my body. But even the ability to sit in front of the TV and watch On-Demand and nothing else is nice.

Freedom: as an adult, I have the singular ability to just pick up and go, where I want and when I want. Little planning to house the dog, get time off, and BAM, I'm outta here. Literally ANYWHERE in the world if I want. Freedom of time, and Freedom of money. It's a nice feeling.

My Faith: Here is where I'm thankful but also concerned. I am human, and I have my human doubts. I envy Tilam his surety of faith, surety of connection, and surety of his God. I do not have that - perhaps I will find it, perhaps I'm looking in the wrong place, perhaps I'm looking in the wrong way. I hope this clears as I get older.

Small Challenges...Small Moments...Yes.

My Fellow Woman...without whom I'd have to either become self-sufficient or gay, neither of which an attractive option.

LIFE: the greatest gift given to me by God. It's a great thing, to be alive. It's a good and exciting time to be alive. All in All, I'd rather be alive than dead (my destiny in heaven outside this equation). Highs, Lows, Angry, Sad, experiencing life and all that goes into it is pretty cool. I'd love to live for 500 years...